Excerpt 2: Happy Bromance Day!
Book 3: The With Me Series
The With Me guys celebrate their Valentine’s Day. (Jamie’s POV)
“You know what we need to do?” I ask after Hailey and Daphne leave for their Galentine’s Day dinner.
Nick and Caleb don’t bother looking away from watching TV, but Griff puts down the book he was reading and waits for me to continue.
“It’s genius, really,” I say. “One of my best ideas.”
Nick snorts at that and looks over at me. “Okay, McAlister, let’s hear about this so-called best idea.”
“Let’s have our own Valentine’s Day but for bromance. It can be called Happy Bromance Day.”
No one says anything.
“Think about it. Next year, we’ll be seniors. Who knows what’s going to happen once we graduate? We should celebrate our bromance.”
Caleb turns off the TV. “And what exactly do you have in mind? Because if this is another mission to find out if Jack is a secret agent or not . . .”
“He’s totally a secret agent,” I say and ignore Griff’s glower. And even if Jack isn’t an secret agent, it’s fun to annoy him. He’s like the older brother I never had. And since Griff doesn’t perform in the role of annoying younger brother, it is my obligation to fill that role. Such a hardship, but someone has to do it.
“You’re not going to try and Magic Mike us again, are you?” Nick asks.
“Admit it. You had fun dancing on that stage. If you can call it dancing,” I say. “But no, I’m not going to Magic Mike you. And, no, Griff, I didn’t buy tickets for 50 Shades of Gray. I know that’s what you’re really reading—no way is anyone ever that riveted to Moby Dick.”
Griff gives me a look.
“But we should go out. Have dinner. Shoot the shit,” I say and open the bathroom door where I stocked the secret stash. “And I have presents.”
“McAlister, you’re serious?” Nick asks after he takes his small bag, decorated with Barbie’s face.
“Of course I’m serious. You guys are my friends. Griff is my best friend.” I hand Griff a small box. “Don’t worry, Griff, I got you a necklace. You can keep the Best part; I’ll keep the Friends.”
“You’re joking,” Griff says.
“Open it and find out,” I say.
Nick opens up his first, rifling through the glittery pink tissue paper, and stares at the heart-shaped box. “Chocolate.”
“They’re ball-shaped. I figure you needed some balls so . . .”
Nick tosses a pillow at me, which I avoid.
“Caleb,” I say. “You’re next.”
Caleb stares at the Hello, Kitty bag with trepidation in his gaze. “I have a feeling this is going to be inappropriate.”
“Me? Inappropriate? Never.”
Caleb huffs out a sigh and opens. A teddy bear that has a Squeeze Me sticker on it. Caleb squeezes it.
“Kiss me,” the bear says in a low growl.
“Now, you,” I say to Griff.
Griff opens the box. “You weren’t joking. You actually bought a Best Friends necklace.”
“I know you’re all touched. Truly and deeply touched.” I wipe fake tears away from my eyes. “Now, let’s go to dinner.”
“But, McAlister,” Nick says. “We have something for you.”
I pause, not liking their shared looks of . . . mischief. This spells trouble.
“Yeah, we do. It’s in the kitchen,” Caleb says.
“I made reservations. We really need to get going.”
Nick stands. “We insist.”
“Okay, okay. Jeez. If you guys want to kiss me, you just have to say so. We blonds are hard to resist—”
I follow my friends to the kitchen, preparing myself for the worst. There’ll be a pie thrown in my face, or they’ve bought me chocolate-covered crickets, or even worse—they bought me a DVD collection of The Gilmore Girls.
But it’s none of those things.
It’s a tiny cake, made in the shape of a penis.
“We tried to make it true to life,” Caleb says. “But we might have made it too big.”
I love these guys.
I go to the cupboard and take out a knife. And then I whack off the tip of the penis cake.
The guys wince.
“Sheesh, Jamie,” Caleb says. “You didn’t have to do that.”
I cut more tiny slices of the cake, and since it is very small, the cake is just enough for us four. “You guys made the cock cake. You have to taste it. Stuff the cock in your mouth, guys. And make sure you swallow.”
We all start laughing and eat our slices of cake.
“Now, where exactly did you make reservations?” Nick asks.
“Guys, I went all out.” I throw the paper plates away and put the forks in the dishwasher. “We’re going to McDonald’s.”
“You’re going to McDonald’s in a suit?”
I tug my bowtie. “It’s a tux. And yes, of course. It is Happy Bromance Day, after all. We need to make it special.”
Caleb shares a long look with the other two, then turns to me. “Okay, I’m game. I’ll dress up. Let’s celebrate our bromance in style.”
And we do exactly that.